Gossip Dirt | Celebrity Gossip

For those dirty old men out there who can’t get their hands on an actual celebrity, Pipedream Products has created the next best thing: blow-up dolls.

Digitalspy.com reports that Jessica Simpson and Lindsay Lohan were recently added to the inflatable toy collection and are available to purchase for a modest $19.95; plus shipping and uh…handling.

The Lindsay Fully Loaded Love Doll is described as - “She’s no love bug, she’s a fiery red…who never says no and is always up for a good time.”

Simpson’s slogan, on the other hand, may cause BF Tony Romo to blow a gasket or two - “She’s sexy, newly single, and ready for you! This hot blonde bombshell has three thrilling h**** to satisfy your every desire, and since she’s dumb as an ox, she never says no!” If I were the cheeky inventors I’d be running for the hills right about now!

Apparently the buxom starlets aren’t the only “ladies” gracing the Pipedream line; for the same price you can pick up Jessica Alba, Eva Longoria, Christina Aguilera, Pamela Anderson, Jennifer Lopez, Paris Hilton and even Sarah Jessica Parker. That last one is rather interesting, seeing as the Sex in the City actress was voted “Unsexiest Woman Alive” by Maxim magazine.

But wait, there’s one more! Allegedly our beloved Britney Spears will be up for sale in the near future.  

Wouldn’t it be funny if the company came out with a second line, like – “Famous by Association”? Heather Mills would be a hilarious addition, what with that perpetual scowl of hers!

Look no further DUI riddled A-Listers; P Diddy is here to help.

Puff Daddy or Diddy or whatever he’s going by these days has decided to invest in a chauffeur service to stop stars from drinking & driving, reports The New Zealand Herald.

We’re well aware of the craziness that ensues at those high-profile celebrity events, and according to Diddy’s spokesperson, “after partnering with Ciroc vodka, he wants to make sure everyone’s partying responsibly.” I’m sure his mother would be proud.

The rapper’s incentive for creating the in-the-works assistance? “Making sure nobody gets arrested!”

Too bad a time machine hasn’t been invented – otherwise Kiefer Sutherland, Lindsay Lohan, Paris Hilton and Mischa Barton could have benefitted from this enticing proposal.

Although P Diddy’s plan is a thoughtful gesture, stars should really take responsibility for their own actions. If they don’t wish to spend a night in the drunk-tank, they should either stick to soda or arrange their own damn rides home.

Check this out peeps – hardcore “gangsta” Kevin Federline will be raking in some major bank next week for celebrating his big 3-0 in Vegas. Just how much is Pure nightclub allegedly dishing out for the poser-rapper’s appearance?  About $175,000, give or take a buck or two.

“Kevin is a big spender, and a draw for the crowds,” a family insider slipped to PageSix.com. “So the money he gets is nothing compared to the money they make.” But it’s still better than applying at McDonalds, which was probably his alternative.

Although the b-day bash is slated for March 21^st, K-Fed is reportedly hankering for a little more me-time while visiting Sin City. Translation? He plans to dump the kiddies off at Brit-Brit’s.

“Kevin is hoping Britney Spears will be able to have time with the boys for a few days while he is gone, but it all depends on how she is doing at the time,” the source stated. “Also, Kevin has to feel confident that Jamie [Spears] will make sure the boys are watched over at all times while she is with them. Kevin loves Vegas and would like to make a party time out of it.”

Funny how Federline requests these visits when it suits his needs. Spears should pull one of her crazy stunts just to pi$$ him off!

What’s worse than one K-Fed? Two K-Feds. Unbeknownst to most, the unemployed moocher has a brother named Chris who happened to celebrate his own birthday earlier this week. Apparently tweedle-dee and tweedle-dum will both be rockin’ the house on the 21^st; fathers lock up your daughters.

On Monday Spears’ lawyer argued that the Break the Ice singer shouldn’t be responsible for Federline’s legal fees, which have added up to around $500,000.

Well happy birthday Kevin, now you can finally start paying off your attorney!